Việt Kiều

Today is the 32nd anniversary of the fall of Saigon. Every year my parents go to some type of a dinner commemorating it but it has had little effect on my life. Tonight, we had dinner together and my parents spoke at length about their story and it hit me hard that it is also my story. A part of my past that somehow I have lost along the way. Granted I was still a toddler yet it saddened me that I knew so little about it. Over the years my parents have given me little bits of the story, some hilarious, some sad but all are invariably moving.

I've always known that my dad was an officer in the South Vietnamese army and spent the 4 years between the fall of Saigon and when we fled as a constant fugitive. There were many failed attempts at leaving and even more close calls before we successfully landed in Malaysia. Perhaps it's because we're older, but my parents were much more honest tonight about the horror and terror of those years. Even more shocking was realizing that they were younger than I am now when they went through this. And I thought I had troubles...

I did some quick research this evening and was shocked to find that there are an estimated 1.6 million Vietnamese boat people who fled Vietnam between 1975 to the late 1980s. According to the report of United Nations High Commissioner For Refugees, 1/3 of these people died at sea by killing, storms, illness,and food shortage. Luckily, my family landed safely in Malaysia's main refugee camp, the island of Pulau Bidong. A few months later, we flew to Campbell River, BC where I spent much of my youth.

Against all odds, my parents landed in Canada with nothing and have overcome language barriers and cultural differences to raise 5 relatively normal and moderately successful children. I've always wanted to write their story and perhaps one day I will finally find the time and discipline to do it. In the meantime, these stories serve as a reality check for me and remind me how much I love and respect my mom and dad. I am currently awed by them and that's a great feeling.

I have totally sucked about keeping this updated. I even have 4 or 5 draft ideas that have been sitting there waiting to be written for the past month but just can't seem to find the time. That's because when I have a spare minute I'm on Facebook being a voyeur on other people's lives. Very odd how that particular social network has appealed to such a mass audience. Even more odd that everyones boundaries around privacy seems to have stretched significantly.

The worse part is that I've actually had a lot of people tell me that they've enjoyed this blog in recent days. Kind of funny to hear as I'm still not sure how I feel about sharing the writing. I've been writing in journals since I was a child but have always kept it private so no one has ever read anything I haven't written outside of work and the occasional rant email (unless one of my nosy siblings got to one of my books. Yes, Sally, that means you).

Anyways, this note is for you guys who do tune in...I haven't forgotten. Watch for the Vegas post coming soon.

The worse question in the world

Why are you still single?

Okay, how do you answer such a stupid question? Either you're conceited and say that you haven't found anyone good/hot/smart enough or are self-deprecating and say that no one wants you. God forbid you say it's because you actually *gasp* WANT to be single. That obviously doesn't compute for those...erm, fortunate ones(?) who are in a relationship.

As I write this, I can't help but think of the relationships I've seen fall to ruin all around me lately. Granted, at this age, you're either going to make a go at it or you'll walk away. No one really wants to waste their time but in our younger years we tend to tolerate more stupidity and ridiculousness for the trade off of having good conversation, sex or dinners. If you're lucky, you'll get all three, not necessarily in that order of course. But I digress.

This past year has seen a slew of train wreck breakups through my extended network of friends. I am luckily in a Utopia of no drama or stress, at least as it pertains to the opposite sex. I'm happily callous in my casual relationships and blissfully selfish with my time. That's right and I'm not afraid to admit it.

Oh, and I am VERY happy to be single regardless of the reason. Because frankly, does the "why" really matter?